I May Be Insane.

I just took the MMPI-2 test again as I am in the process of applying to CRM long-term. I’m going to be assessed by a counselor regarding my health and overall well-being, and I thought the following questions were particularly insightful and relevant to my possibilities of being accepted. Enjoy this insanity, with my sarcastic wittyness in parenthesis (All answers must be True or False):

23. At times I feel like smashing things. (Who doesn’t?).

33. I have a cough most of the time. (Chronic coughing = Psychologically unhealthy?).

38. I have never been in trouble because of my sex behavior (Correct, yet who would admit this?).

49. I have enjoyed using marijuana (False, yet see #38).

51. I am very seldom troubled by constipation (Incredibly relevant to my ability to live missionally!).

69. My hands have not become clumsy or awkward (Huh?).

71. I believe I am being plotted against (Don’t we all?).

90. I am afraid of finding myself in a closet or small closed space (Most people’s fears involve places we hang clothes?).

199. Particular odors come to me at times (Only after eating broccoli or greasy Mexican food).

259. I like repairing a door latch (Umm, no).

286. I am not afraid of mice (Only Mickey).

Fresh Anticipation.

“One characteristic that marks the average church today is lack of anticipation. Christians when they meet do not expect anything unusual to happen; consequently only the usual happens, and that usual is as predictable as the setting of the sun…

We need today a fresh spirit of anticipation that springs out of the promises of God. We must declare war on the mood of nonexpectation, and come together with childlike faith. Only then can we know again the beauty and wonder of the Lord’s presence among us.” [AW Tozer (God Tells The Man Who Cares, pp. 168,170)]

Sometimes Tozer defies the 140 character limits of Twitter, so I wanted to add all of this passage.  It is such a challenge to me, personally. I know we cannot put the mighty presence and work of God on any schedule that involves man’s doing.  But there has to be an expectation that when we gather as His people anything can and should happen because the God of all Creation is in our midst.

Thanks, Louie Giglio, for letting me steal your words today.

To Be Conscious.

I want my heart to be in this place today.

World AIDS Day 2009.

I LIKE that our world recognizes the seriousness that is the pandemic of AIDS affecting our globe.

I UNLIKE the fact that this is no longer a global problem to me…but I see faces, friends, and stories when I think about HIV/AIDS.

Get educated today, folks. This injustice must end in our lifetimes…

World AIDS Day

Coming Home!

Hello my dear friends and family…

I hope you are well this Thanksgiving week. I just finished up my Apprenticeship year with NieuCommunities South Africa this past Friday, November 20th, which is wild (even wilder being the fact that I dash off this quick note to you from London, a prayer stop involving longer-term future discernment)!  I am back in California Wednesday, November 25th to celebrate the holidays and rest a bit upon re-entry.  I am taking a week off to simply re-enter life with family in the States, but will start up reconnecting with people again on Thursday, December 3rd.  I would LOVE to connect with as many of you as possible via email, phone, or in person as soon as possible!

There is much to fill you in on, but the short story now is that I have been invited to join the NieuCommunities staff team in Pretoria, South Africa as we begin to reimagine/reenvision NieuCommunities’ role in discipling and sending South African missional leaders/communities into our world. I will likely spend the next 2 years doing this (evaluating how it is going at the end of 2010), and then evaluate a longer term ‘place’ of calling to settle down for a longer stint (likely in leading a missional/sending community of friends somewhere else in the globe).  This will all take place under the umbrella of CRM (http://crmleaders.org), which I will join officially in late December/January after an assessment and orientation process.

Thus, I will spend some of December making the rounds thanking my donor base (churches, friends, family) for this incredible year of discernment and growth here as an Apprentice, and begin to turn my focus towards full-time, long-term support raising in January and February 2010.  I don’t have an exact leave date again, but expect to head back to South Africa sometime in early March 2010.

So my questions to you are:

a. Can we spend time together soon? When?

b. Will you please update me as to how things are going in your world? I can’t wait to sit with you in person and reconnect…

c. Will you please begin to prayerfully consider remaining a part of my financial support team as I transition to long-term work with NieuCommunities South Africa?  I am not sure of my budget needs yet, but it will be something like $2,500-$3,000/month after taxes with ministry expenses…at least, this is my best understanding at this point.  Much more coming on this in early December…

My rough December schedule at this point:

*Wednesday, Nov 25th-Wednesday, Dec 2nd: Re-Entry to California(!)//Rest over Thanksgiving Holiday Week in San Jose

*Thursday, Dec 3rd-Saturday, Dec 6th: San Jose (Application to CRM, Thanking Donors, Available to meet)

*Sunday, Dec 7th-Wednesday, Dec 16th: Orange County (CRM Assessment, Thanking Donors, Reconnecting with churches and friends)

*Thursday, December 17th-Saturday, December 19th: San Jose (1 on 1’s)

*Sunday, December 20th-Saturday, December 26th: Christmas Holiday (OFF)

*Saturday, December 26th-Friday, Jan 1st: Urbana Student Missions Conference with CRM (I’m helping coach/spiritually direct prospective students interested in CRM’s work around the globe).

I’ll email out the chunks of time I will be in Orange County and San Jose in Jan/Feb later in December…Please look out for a few creative, more large-scale gatherings, that I will be hosting in Jan/Feb to both raise awareness of my work in South Africa, as well as hopefully inspire you in your own journey of becoming ‘who you already are…’ Can’t wait to reconnect in gratitude for all you have given me this year…

Our Deepest Fear.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, who am I

To be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?

Actually who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.

There is nothing enlightened about shrinking

So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.

And when we let our own light shine,

We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear,

Our presence automatically liberates others.

[Marianne Williamson]

China Gets Africa?

I can’t find the link online at Time.com, but the end essay of the most recent print mag contains a fascinating article entitled ‘China’s Africa Gambit.’ It speaks of Asia’s largest consumer economy’s calculated risk that Africa is the ‘next great’ untapped consumer market, and in fact statistics show that African economies have been growing at 6-7% GDP the past decade, which is a figure that mirrors India’s impressive GDP growth at the same time.

Here’s the money (HA!) quote:

“Our common impression of Africa owes more to Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness than we would like to let on: Africa is inscrutable, wild, primitive and decades away from genuine modernization. Like the European businessmen in Conrad’s 1902 novel, we assume Africa’s only assets come from the land or beneath it. In the Heart of Darkness it was ivory. Now it is oil and minerals.

But China has caught onto something that eludes most governments and companies in the West. Chinese state-owned and private enterprises believe African consumers could be the great untapped gold mine. Beijing’s engagement with African leaders and governments is increasingly about ensuring that Chinese firms are best placed to sell their products when Africans start buying.”

I am still working out my thoughts regarding capitalistic consumerism, and I know Beijing is simply looking at its bottom line, but I wonder if Chinese engagement with African leaders could actually empower African nations towards healthy growth and competition? Hmm…

Why I Love Bill Simmons.

I bust out laughing every week at Bill Simmons, the best sportswriter alive. I don’t agree with all his content, but he’s both side-splittingly hilarious, a genius sports analyst and master theorist, and surprisingly transparent about how much he loves his friends. I hate how much he loves Boston sports, but hey, everyone’s got a gimmick.

The following paragraphs on his oldest friends are especially dear to me in these days as I prepare to re-connect with those whom I have loved the deepest and longest in my life. I can’t wait to see you family and friends!

That’s what happens when you get old. People move, people have kids, and it’s not uncommon to go 18 months without seeing one of your best friends. If somebody told you this would happen when you were 25 or younger, you would punch them in the face. You would refuse to believe it. But it happens to everyone. It just does…We made it. It’s been 13 years since our first monster Vegas trip together. Nothing has changed. We are the same guys. The truth is, you have your oldest friends in life, and then you have everyone else. Nothing will trump your oldest friends. Any amount of time can pass without your feeling as if you’ve grown apart because, really, you can’t. It’s like a plant. You just have to water it every so often and you’re good.

Messy Thoughts Seven Days Out.

• I’m emotionally drained from saying goodbye so frequently, so sincerely, and so deeply these past few weeks. I have done this better than ever before in my life, and still feel that a huge hole is coming quickly in my life (quickly would be in less than seven days!).
• There is so much going on in my heart right now that I don’t even begin to know how to name what is in it. Excitement about coming home, anxiousness about the long journey ahead of preparing to come back here in March, fear about the previous two things, and a general exhaustion with any end of the year.
• It is so weird that next week is Thanksgiving and I am sweating in the humidity of the approaching summer thunderstorm season.
• I can’t fathom that I am spending two days in London next week praying about ‘down-the-line’ opportunities there, be it several years from now or whatever.
• I can’t wait for Mexican food, bodyboarding NW winter swells, family, and friends.
• I will deeply miss my growing community of friends here, my ministry partners,driving a stick-shift on the left side of the road, and of course Sarah Maxie!

This unbelievable shot by Tom Cozad (newportsurfshots.com) of Newport Elementary really made me miss California.

• I really feel like I am becoming a different sort of man this year.  In many ways I am Chris Kamalski more than ever before, yet integrating this ‘new’ (in some ways) self will be challenging upon coming home. In some ways, I feel like my re-entry home may be harder than I first anticipated. South Africa has become home to me in some ways.
• Please pray for me this week as I say goodbyes–that I would be present!

Happy Birthday Nancy Bolde Kamalski!

Three years later and this pictured could have been snapped today (Although the Starbucks writing would probably not be in Thai).

Mom, I love you so much, and have missed you so much this year while in South Africa. I pray that your birthday is filled with laughter, hot chocolate, a good dinner, and the anticipation of spending good quality time together in 2 short weeks…I am proud to be your son!